Devil Games or Man that Takes Me Back…

Wandering about on Heimy’s blog I ran across a post that took me back to my college days (damn, thinking about the fact that I have “college days” sure does make me feel old). Heimy makes note of the wonderful, fantastically low-tech video game X-Com. This game is a Devil Game. Now before any of my conservative readers get bent out of shape (something that is unlikely to happen as I have almost no readers anyways, and most of them aren’t all that conservative, see last post) let me explain. A Devil Game is a video game that does certain things to one’s life. There are very specific criteria that make a game a Devil Game. They are as follows:

1.If you play a game for more than 6hrs in one sitting, it is a Devil Game.
2.If you intentionally choose to play a game over spending time with other human beings, it is a Devil Game.
3.If you neglect pressing matters like homework, work, bathroom breaks, etc. in order to play a game, it is a Devil Game.
4.If you play a game instead of sleeping, it is a Devil Game.
5.If you spend your time away from home thinking about playing a game, it is a Devil Game.

Anyways, Chris has recently discovered a new video game with the same essential concept as X-Com. I hate to burst his bubble, but there have, in fact, been at least three evolutions of X-Com itself over the past decade or so. I once very seriously considered buying one for Chris as a b-day present, but thought that it would be cruel to expose him again. Like buying a dime bag for a heroin addict or bringing some Johnny Walker Blue to an AA meeting.

Anyways, Chris’ post brought me back to the old days and I felt the need to ramble. Night all.

Absence Makes the Heart…

So I’m pretty sure that after my long thesis hiatus I’m back to a readership of none (or one if you count my own narcissistic perusal of my blog). That’s a bummer cause at my height I actually had a few regulars. Oh well, not much to be done about it I suppose. I’m gonna keep blogging regardless, mostly because this blog was always about self-indulgence and self-gratification anyways. So, for those readers who do happen across me once again, cheers and welcome. And to my one true regular, at least I’ll always know that you agree with me.

Apologies…

Jin and I went out tonight for a nice little date. Saw a show, went for a walk, ate dipped cones from Dairy Queen. The movie was Click starring Adam Sandler. It was a pretty standard romantic comedy with some good Sandler brand humor. I won’t give too much away but suffice to say that this is an “I wasn’t a good enough person and regret that I wasted my life on work instead of family.” There was, however, one quite touching bit in the middle. Sandler, on his death bed, gives advice and love to each member of his family, ending with his estranged wife. To her he says only one thing, “I’m sorry.”

I don’t know exactly where my life will take me. I have some dreams and goals and ambitions, but in the end I’m pretty much okay with the fact that there are some things that I think I’ll do that I won’t ever end up getting to. But even knowing this there’s at least one thing that I don’t ever want to have as a part of my life. I don’t ever want to die apologizing. I’m sure I’ll have regrets, and I’m sure I’ll be disappointed with some parts of my life, but I pray that my last words will not be “I’m sorry.”

To die being sorry is to die believing that you have truly squandered your life. Though I vacillate on the exact nature of what will happen when I die, I think that at least part of it will be an encounter with God, a judgment of sorts. I wonder if I could ever face God, the one who gave me the opportunity to live, and tell him that the opportunity was wasted on me.